"...quit if he had to..." - 8,

[morrobay1990]

Title: “...quit if he had to...” - 8
Author: morrobay1990
Genre: post canon
Warning:
Word count: 420
Disclaimer: Jack & Ennis are AP's
♥ Ennis

Ennis went back to ranch work, hired on here and there, not getting much ahead but glad enough to be around stock again, free to drop things, quit if he had to, and go into the mountains at short notice.


















Shit, Jack was gonna be pissed.

But how was Ennis supposed to know that the Denver show would end up being so soon after their last trip? So soon that it was impossible to get that time off...

And hadn't he fixed it so they got together earlier that last time?

Jack wouldn't care about that now, though.

After they had set up the Denver trip, Jack had been so excited that Ennis had even come up with the damn idea, it was all he could talk about...that is, when he wasn't showing his appreciation in various and strenuous and lengthy physical ways...

Ennis struggled with how to let him know that he wouldn't be able to make it...how to let him know that it hurt him, too.

He knew he should call, knew he should call...knew that simply sending a card back was cowardly...

But telling Jack something he didn't want to hear...telling him something he knew would hurt him...

Well, Jack wasn't the only one with a tender heart.

Ennis had feelings...and he knew what Jack thought...in his heart, he knew a lot more than he let on.

He knew Jack thought that Ennis saw their meetings as a quick getaway for sex...that he didn't want anything more...that he was content...happy, even...with the few times a year they had with each other.

If Ennis was a different kind of man, a man who could put words to his feelings, maybe Jack would understand...

Maybe Ennis should try harder...

Try to what?

Try to overcome the trauma that was his childhood...

Try to forget the sight that no one should see, let alone a nine year old boy...

Try to come to grips with feelings that strangled him...

Try to accept a love that everything in him, everything around him, told him was wrong...but that felt so perfect...

If he was a different kind of man, maybe Jack wouldn't love him as much as he did...

who

fucking

knows





“Hello?”

“Jack.”

“....................yeah.......” he ain't goin

“Jack...I'm sorry...you know I am

Jack....

“Can't be there, huh?” what else is new?

“I want to...”

Jack...

“Yeah...sure...no problem...I didn't even pay for the room yet...”

“Jack.............”

“Yeah...........see ya next time........”

“I might be able to get away a little early in October...”

“ ”

“Jack?”



















"Hello?"

"Michael...it's Jack..."

Comments

[sjmarv.livejournal.com]

"Damn, you are cruel!!! And Ennis is a butthead!" You know I'm laughing, dontcha? You are too good at this!

Susan

[morrobay1990.livejournal.com]

butthead?

laughing?

not get

[sjmarv.livejournal.com]

Ennis is a butthead for leading Jack on and then letting him down.

Well, Ennis' loss is Michael's gain.

I'm laughing at myself because from the previous couple of chapters I hoped you were writing that they were on their way to fixing it together - finally. I should have known better as you sick to canon much better than I ever could. Just didn't want you to think I was mad at you for not getting them together in this fic.

S

[moyaima.livejournal.com]

nooooooo .... :( ....

[morrobay1990.livejournal.com]

I know...I'm sorry

[mazaher.livejournal.com]

You know what, this reminds me of that movie by Ken Loach, My name Is Joe (1998). The main character is trying to bring his fucked-up life back on track, but however hard he tries, it never seems to be enough to overcome the hardships he meets.
Sometimes where there's a will there really is not a way, and one can actually die trying to walk off-track through a desert.
AP's canon is not the only way things could take a turn for the worse. I never lose hope for a happy ending, but I can't deny the odds are not looking good at this point...
(btw, what about Staying in Signal?)

[morrobay1990.livejournal.com]

Yes, turn for the worse...

I can't think of SIS until I resolve this one...and I don't even know if I can do that

[mazaher.livejournal.com]

I've always wondered what sort of counter-trauma could have made Ennis get over his fear of himself *and Jack* being murdered. Perhaps seeing with his own eyes how Jack was running that risk anyway, with or without him...?

[heathyluv.livejournal.com]

Genius!!!!!!

[morrobay1990.livejournal.com]

I can only hope you mean that...thanks

[eandj.livejournal.com]

“Yeah...sure...no problem...I didn't even pay for the room yet...”

Jack can't even believe in Ennis at all
that's to sad
and no Ennis- he won't understand if you can't talk to him

some things aren't meant to be and that's the hard sad truth
now I'm waiting what you have in store for these two struggling men
Paula

[morrobay1990.livejournal.com]

I feel so bad for both of them...there's just not "the perfect storm"...rather, the opposite.

thanks

real

[joetheone.livejournal.com]

Okay well Michael may want to go to the Denver show but dam he through that card away but old Jack he has a memory like a vise I bet he remembers the number or at least the place he worked. Maybe, he should just go to that show with him and have a good ole time. But, I bet if he goes Ennis will show up and then the all hands are off and I think old Ennis is going to find himself a way to say what he feels for Jack or lose him for good in this one. Okay well if you are running one way. But, I think our Jack here will have a few words of his own. Joe

Oh. Shit.

[soulan.livejournal.com]

All I can think about is that recurring scenario in Peanuts where Charlie Brown is trying to kick the football and Lucy snatches it away at the last second.

Ummm, can you please make this conversation turn out to be a nightmare? ;D

[sliveredmoon.livejournal.com]

Well. I have to give you credit for honesty in dealing with Jack's feelings. Sometimes love isn't nearly enough.

....quit if he had to...

[kathan12.livejournal.com]

This is so sad for Ennis and Jack. They were so happy about Denver and now this..."he aint going".
This really got me re Ennis: "...he knew a lot more then he let on". How true.
So sad.

kathy

Quits

[cwby30.livejournal.com]

Evenin'.

Well, and here I thought he took those low-paying ranch jobs so he could quit if he had to and take off on short notice... what gives? Easy... Ennis is still scared and doesn't know how to try harder. He started, then gave up willingly at the first obstacle of his own making. Who or what will give him the boot in the ass that he needs? Never happened did in OS, not even The Argument. Are you going to here? I'll be a long for this ride, seems like no one is holding the reins any more, and it's just running out of control on both sides, and want to be there when one or both of them goes over the head when it comes to an unexpectedly sudden halt.

Thanks again.

Bud

"quit if he had to..."

[argentine65.livejournal.com]

Jack is so tired of Ennis finding excuses for not being together and Ennis still can talk clear with his man. He made a try thinking about going to Denver but that was all. I hope they can find a way to fix it. Thank you for sharing. Martha

[juliathecat.livejournal.com]

I hadn't realized that this was a sequel of "“...and he found ways to spend it" until I saw Michael's name.

I thought Jack threw away his card. Can I say something? I'm glad that he had somehow memorized Michael's number.

Thanks.

JC

[tizi17.livejournal.com]

yeah. that's how it went.
but all ennis' feelings there.. if he just had put them out ONCE... *sigh*..
thanks again, and a great picture, too!

[sid401k.livejournal.com]

Another quote from AP:

...no news. Nothing ended, nothing begun, nothing resolved...

Sometimes I want to cry, and other times I want to bang their heads together...

[ramona4jake.livejournal.com]

Jack, don't ! don't do to Michael what Ennis kinda do to you !.... Damn, Ennis ! so torn up, not being able to make the right but tougher decision !..

thank you, this is another beautiful, successful drabble series !

[blackbird-y.livejournal.com]

Fuck....

:'(

My poor heart..

Nev