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Title: Looking Forward
Author: [livejournal.com profile] morrobay1990
Genre: post canon
Word count: 400
Disclaimer: Jack & Ennis are AP's
♥ Jack

a/n: Well, it's Pat Metheny "Spiritual” time again. For the 3 years that I've been writing, I always play this track when certain moods strike...and they are striking now with a vengeance. I have gone completely off reading and writing au!au...I found that I had to get back to what brought me here in the first place. I can't change the story, but I can try to piece together what might have happened during their time together...some will be sad, some not so...the last one was Looking Back, when Jack sent Ennis a postcard to meet up in the Big Horns...so now Looking Forward...I hope you like them...feedback and comments are always welcome.
I said in a comment that I'm doing these because I'm trying to figure it out, trying to get some peace, but that I was afraid...and so I am...












Ennis quickly read the postcard then went back to his truck and put it on the front seat along with the rest of his mail...looked down at it occasionally while he was driving. State of Texas, with some pictures and writing around it...well, he'd look at it later.

He drove pretty fast to get the groceries home and put up before the frozen stuff melted and the milk got warm...doesn't take long when it's 104...so he hauled it all inside, looked at the mail real quick, post card on top...a big church, and a post office...huh.

He turned on the little TV for noise as he put the stuff away, went and put the mail on the little table in his bedroom for later...happened to notice that Childress was marked with a star, near the top of the state.

In the kitchen he turned on the fan and decided to cook outside so it wouldn't heat up the trailer.

Outside he got everything ready and went in, stopped in the bedroom and glanced at the card again, turned it over quickly... Big Horns...then he washed his hands and put the chops on a plate.

He got the grill started and laid the chops on, let them get a good sizzle going, then put some corn and potatoes on, wrapped in tin foil, (Jack had showed him that once) so they cooked a little slower...opened a beer and sat back in an old lawn chair. There was a breeze...a hot breeze, but better than nothing, he guessed.

Not as good as the Big Horns.

Through the open window he heard the sports guy talking about college football – that time of year again - but then the weather guy took over and said that a storm was pushing down out of Canada and should cool things off, while bringing much-needed rain to the area.

He whistled a little, and got up to turn the chops.

Rain and cool air and the Big Horns. And Jack. It was shaping up to be a pretty good night.

Then he went inside, into the bedroom, opened the closet and, from the top shelf, took out the small stack of four blank postcards he kept there...two had pictures and two were plain white. The picture ones had Wyoming in big letters, with the various cowboy-type attractions meant for tourists.

He took one of the plain ones...he thought, thank Christ...he wrote, just as he had all those years ago...

You bet.

Savoring It

Date: 2011-07-29 01:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] littlecove.livejournal.com
The picture you paint of Ennis stretching out the reading of the postcard, savoring it, making it last - really well done. I'm looking forward to reading more of these glimpses of their time apart and their moments together.

Re: Savoring It

Date: 2011-07-30 01:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrobay1990.livejournal.com
Thanks...I have to know that he thought about Jack when they were apart...we have so little to go on in the ss...

future

Date: 2011-07-29 01:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joetheone.livejournal.com
Always good to have hope and a goal to look forward to and this is one we all would want. Joe

Re: future

Date: 2011-07-30 01:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrobay1990.livejournal.com
thanks for reading, Joe. At least he had something to look forward to.

Date: 2011-07-29 02:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] soulan.livejournal.com
That's right, "he does not force his attention on it" but lets the postcard stoke the day. Practice for the time when he'll have to rely on dreams alone.

Date: 2011-07-30 02:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrobay1990.livejournal.com
one of the best lines in the ss for me...I felt that exact way about the movie when I first saw it. I wanted to watch it over and over, but forced myself not to...I didn't want it to lose its power over me...fat chance.

thanks for reading and your comments, as always.

n

Date: 2011-07-29 07:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tizi17.livejournal.com
you know? i so understand what you say here.. i have been in this for more than 4 years, and again, right now, i have the music going, i watch the film (again and again) and i read canon, what i can get..
there is something magical, something rooted deep that takes us back, always..
thank you for following your feelings..

Date: 2011-07-30 02:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrobay1990.livejournal.com
I'm so glad you feel that way, too...I figured I couldn't be the only one, although after all this time, most people have moved on. I want to only remember them as they were, not as cartoons of themselves.

thanks so much, and I hope you enjoy the journey.

Date: 2011-07-29 12:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mazaher.livejournal.com
Afraid. It's a horrible feeling, when at every bit of peace you find, you wonder if it's just an illusion-- I hope real peace will find you. And Ennis. And Jack. And anybody else who's looking for it.
Meanwhile, this *will* be a pretty good night.
Thank you.

Date: 2011-07-30 02:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrobay1990.livejournal.com
I guess the feeling I have isn't really fear, but utter bewilderment that I can't get over these characters, this story, this movie, after all this time. What is it? Ok, a love story...there's been a lot of them...ok, the actors, maybe...I really can't pin it down, but they just won't let me rest...

thank you, your comments always mean a lot to me.

Date: 2011-07-30 02:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mazaher.livejournal.com
As for myself, I have long since taken stock of the fact that I don't "get over" anything, ever. I may not watch/read/write about it as often anymore, but I seem to never leave anything behind. Why should I? Good things, things which make *sense*, never get stale. They keep saying something meaningful and new, even after years of frequentation. They call at you, you answer, and that's good, because the conversation is worth it. Peace will come, at some point.

Date: 2011-07-29 12:16 pm (UTC)
lightning070: (Jake Gyllenhaal Jazz)
From: [personal profile] lightning070
Great story. I liked how Ennis saved the post card, merely reading pieces of it during the day. :)

Date: 2011-07-30 02:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrobay1990.livejournal.com
yes, stretching out a small thing to make it last and get the most out of it.

I'm glad you like it, thanks for taking the time to leave a comment.

Date: 2011-07-30 09:19 pm (UTC)
lightning070: (Jake likey)
From: [personal profile] lightning070
It's no trouble. :) I love leaving comments because I know how much they mean for a writer. :)

Looking forward

Date: 2011-08-02 03:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] argentine65.livejournal.com
Glad to have them again. Me, too, watch the film once a year and always I ended crying. But it is true, this is a love story and the best love story always end bad. Thank you again for sharing. Martha
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